10. "Mitt Romney said he wants to cut funding for
things like Amtrak and PBS, both of which are subsidized by the government. I
don't like the idea of cutting funds for PBS. Things are bad enough already.
One of the Muppets is living in a garbage can." –Jimmy Kimmel
9. "We're learning more and more about the Wisconsin
Congressman. Apparently, he's a huge Green Bay Packers fan. See, that shows you
how far the Republicans have progressed - this time, their VP is a cheesehead.
Remember, last time it was an airhead. That was totally different." –Jay
8. "Paul Ryan is full of excitement, he's drawing big
crowds. The only thing holding Paul Ryan back now according to political
experts is Mitt Romney." –David Letterman
7. "New Jersey Governor Chris Christie is going to be
the keynote speaker at the Republican National Convention, and wherever Chris
Christie goes you know what that means. That's right, unlimited bread
sticks." –David Letterman
6. "According to a new poll, atheism is becoming more
and more popular among Americans. God only knows why." –Jay Leno
5. "Porn star Jenna Jameson has come out for Mitt Romney. So this election
could have a happy ending after all." –Jay Leno
4. "Mitt Romney has picked Paul Ryan as his running mate. Experts say Ryan
can add something vital to this campaign that Mitt Romney lacks: a
personality." –Jay Leno
3. "Paul Ryan likes to hunt and we all know that a vice
president who hunts is always a good choice." –David Letterman
2. "North Korea could test a nuclear missile in two weeks. North Korea
says this launch will go much better than previous ones because they got twice
as much Diet Coke and Mentos." –Jimmy Fallon
1. "How many of you have the Paul Ryan fever? They say
that Paul Ryan will humanize Romney. And I thought, hell, an amoeba could
humanize Romney." – David Letterman
David Letterman's Top 10 Little-Known Facts About Paul Ryan
10. He's only the 32nd white guy to become Republican vice presidential
9. Was runner-up on Season 3 of "The Bachelorette."
8. Always shampoos once, conditions twice.
7. Got his start in Congress as John Boehner's tanning boy.
6. Claims to be "a lady in the streets, but a freak in the sheets."
5. Like the rest of America, wonders what Romney is hiding in his tax returns.
4. Has a good feeling about this Jennifer Aniston marriage working out.
3. Eats nothing but plants, berries and small turtles.
2. Even before working at Oscar Meyer, had reputation for "driving the
1. Born in Kenya.